“The Five Whys Tool… what is the Five Whys Tool?” Vince Rad muttered, staring at one of the comments on his recent Facebook post.
“What’s that honey?” called Julie, Vince’s wife, from the bathroom.
“Oh, Jack Flint commented on my Facebook post and said I should use the Five Whys Tool to figure out if I should accept the promotion or not.”
“What’s the Five Whys Tool?”
“Beats me… oh wait, he said he heard about it from a friend of his named Jeff Perry. Looks like this guy Jeff has a website. Let me click on the link.”
“Well let me know what it says, I’m intrigued.”
“So am I. Give me a minute and I’ll let you know what it says.”
Vince Rad
Vince needed guidance. A 42-year-old father of two, Vince worked as the HR Manager for CommTech, a communications technology company. He had been with CommTech for 12 years now, and his hard work had already paid off. When he had joined the company there were only 31 employees, but the past decade had seen tremendous growth. Now with over 500 employees, 6 locations in the U.S. and 3 more overseas, Vince’s supervisor had spoken with him earlier that day to offer him a promotion to HR Director. Stunned, Vince had asked for 24 hours to think it over and discuss the promotion with Julie.
As he read through Jeff Perry’s post on Career Clarity, Vince couldn’t help but reflect on the timing of this promotion… He had always been the go-to guy in the office, mainly because he never said “no.” He loved his job, and he had spent years working 60-hour weeks. Work was fun, while life at home was work. Gwen, Vince’s and Julie’s 13-year-old daughter, was just a toddler when Vince started with CommTech, but she had been a handful. Vince could still remember driving into work on Monday morning during those first couple years of parenthood utterly exhausted… Wasn’t the weekend supposed to be relaxing?
So, though he couldn’t exactly remember when the 60-hour weeks started, Vince assumed it must have been at least 10 years ago. And even when their 8-year-old son Peter was born, Vince didn’t let his foot off the gas. He had been promoted to HR Manager after 7 rewarding years with the company, he was making great money, and he enjoyed spending time with his co-workers. Why should he change anything now?
The Five Whys Tool
Well, the COVID-19 pandemic changed everything, and that’s why Vince was now reading about the Five Whys Tool on Jeff Perry’s website. Vince had spent 2 1/2 months working from home, and he hadn’t been this happy in years. Spending this much time with Julie had revitalized his marriage, that’s for sure. But even more striking was how his relationship with Gwen and Peter had transformed. Why hadn’t he realized these kids were so fun? He still loved his job, but Vince had found himself over the past couple of weeks counting down the hours until he could log off and be with his kids. Last Saturday they had even filmed a TikTok video that ended up with over 3,000 likes! His kids assured him that 3,000 likes wasn’t much, but that didn’t stop Vince from feeling like the man!
But was everything going to change? This promotion to HR Director would bring with it a 14% increase in salary, 5 extra vacation days, and a fancy office with a window at CommTech… well, once the quarantine had been lifted, obviously. However, the promotion would also entail significantly more travel than Vince was used to. Rather than two weeks away from home per year like Vince had been accustomed to for the past 4 or 5 years, this new role would require him to be away from home one to two weeks per month once travel resumed. That’s why Vince had posted his quandary on Facebook… he hadn’t given all the details of the new position, obviously, but just that it would require him to be away from home a lot more, and he worried about what that would do to his newly revived relationship with Gwen and Peter.
Visualizing The Five Whys Tool
“Huh… so it looks like the Five Whys Tool is a technique that you can utilize to get to the root cause of a problem in your work,” Vince said. “But Jeff Perry also recommends using it for personal matters.”
“Interesting,” Julie replied. “Do you still have it pulled up? I’d like to take a look at it so I can visualize it.”
“Yeah, come on over and look at this,” Vince said. “First you start with a simple question.”
- ‘Why is __________ important to me?’
“So, for example, ‘why is a promotion to HR Director important to me?’ Then, your response becomes the basis for the next ‘why’ question.”
“Huh, this is interesting,” Julie interjected. “In the past I feel like we’ve rushed into a number of decisions. But shouldn’t a promotion, with more money and more paid time off be a no-brainer?”
“It should be,” Vince responded, “but let’s just see where we end up after answering these five whys.”
“Okay. So why is a promotion to HR Director important to you?”
“Honestly, my first thought was the money… I mean, a 14% raise would be incredible. But after spending so much quality time with you and the kids for the past couple of months, I think the 5 extra vacation days (i.e., more paid time off) is honestly what I would be the most excited about. So I’ll put that into the second ‘why’ question.”
The Five Whys Tool In Action
- ‘Why is more paid time off important to me?’
“Well, what do you think?” Julie asked.
“I mean, who wouldn’t want to get paid for not doing anything,” Vince responded.
“True. But think about it for a minute… why do you really want this extra time off?”
“Truthfully,” Vince said, “I regret spending so much time away from home for all these years. I think more paid time off is important to me so that I can develop a deeper relationship with Gwen and Peter.”
“Now you’re getting it!” Julie exclaimed. “It’s not like you have to share this with anyone. So get personal. Just like Jeff Perry said, dig deep so that you can get the clarity you need.”
Digging Deep
“Thanks Babe,” Vince said. “This is kind of fun teaming up on this!”
“I agree,” Julie smiled.
“So let’s see here… question number three.”
- ‘Why is developing a deeper relationship with my kids important to me?’
“I bet I know what you’re about to say,” Julie murmured.
“You know me well,” Vince replied. “And you’re right. Developing a deeper relationship with my kids is important to me because I didn’t have that support growing up from my dad. Heck, I don’t even remember Dad. Sam and Brynn obviously have more memories than me since they’re older, but I don’t think any of us truly remembers much about Dad anymore.”
“So how are you going to phrase that for question four?” Julie asked.
“Well, as I develop a deeper relationship with Gwen and Peter, I want to instill in them a sense of confidence and worth. I guess I just want them to trust me. And I also want them to know that they are more important than my career and my hobbies. Hey… that’s it! Developing a deeper relationship with my kids is important to me so that I can become more selfless.”
“Wow,” Julie sighed… “You really are a great dad Vince.”
“Thanks Babe,” Vince smiled.
Selflessness
“So, question number four,” Vince said.
- ‘Why is becoming more selfless important to me?’
“I think selflessness is what being a parent is all about,” Vince continued. Have you ever heard Sylvia Mathews Burwell’s quote on selflessness?”
“I don’t think I have,” Julie responded.
“She said: ‘day after day, ordinary people become heroes through extraordinary and selfless actions.'”
“You mean we’re heroes for being parents?!” Julie exclaimed.
“You bet,” Vince said. “We may not be recognized by others as heroes, but I’m sure we are Gwen’s and Peter’s heroes… But to respond to this fourth question, I know that my life becomes tremendously satisfying when I serve others, and I want to be a positive, service-oriented role model for Gwen and Peter.”
“I like where your thoughts are headed,” Julie said. “And now it’s my turn to share a quote with you… This comes from an anonymous speaker: ‘helping one person might not change the world, but it could change the world for one person.'”
“I love that!” exclaimed Vince. “And I think now I have what I need to phrase question five.”
“Isn’t question five the final question?” Julie asked.
Wrapping Up The Five Whys Tool
“Well, it does say here in Jeff Perry’s blog post that you don’t necessarily have to stop at 5 whys… you can go 7 or 8 or more if you still haven’t reached the core of WHY you are doing what you’re doing. But I honestly think we’ll get there after this final question.”
- ‘Why is ‘changing the world for one person’ important to me?’
“What do you think?” asked Julie.
“The thought of changing someone’s world truly excites me,” Vince responded. “I know that I have a positive impact at work, and I enjoy what I do, but I have felt a void in my life for years. Over the past couple of months as I have reconnected with you and the kids, I’ve realized what was causing the void. I was so focused on my career progression that I let virtually every other aspect of my life suffer – relationships, mental and physical health, and even our finances.”
“So how can you narrow that down into a response to this final question?” Julie asked.
“I’ve got it!” Vince replied animatedly. “‘Changing someone’s world’ seems challenging to me. I am constantly challenging myself professionally, but I put my personal life on cruise control years ago once I graduated from college. I stopped reading and learning… but times have changed, it’s time for me to focus on my personal development.”
The Resolution of Vince Rad
“So let me summarize what the five whys tool has revealed for you,” Julie said. “This promotion to HR Director would give you more time off… and with that time off, you would be able to focus more time on serving others and challenge yourself personally to do better and to be better.”
“Well said!” Vince exclaimed. “And honestly, I just had a crazy idea… I’m already making great money. What if I countered CommTech’s offer and said, rather than giving me this 14% raise, I want to be able to take one full day off each month the day after a business trip so that I can reconnect with you and the kids?”
“I absolutely love that idea Vince!” Julie replied.
“Perfect, it’s settled. Thanks again for joining me for that exercise Julie!” Vince said.
“No problem sweetheart. We should do stuff like this together more often!”
“I completely agree. Wow, now I’m all fired up. I want to keep this momentum going. I’m sure there are other personal development techniques out there that could change our lives. It’s time for me to follow Jim Rohn’s counsel: ‘Learn to work harder on yourself than you do on your job. If you work hard on your job you can make a living, but if you work hard on yourself you’ll make a fortune.'”
The Rad Dad Pad Disclaimer
There are enough people on the internet telling you what to do and why you should do it. My blog’s focus is idea generation for dads. I will provide you with personal productivity, wealth, and health ideas in a creative way, and then I leave the rest to you… I don’t implement or follow every idea I share on my blog – there wouldn’t be enough time in the day to do that! But I do believe that one idea that comes to you in a moment of inspiration or is presented to you at the right time in the right way can change your life. So I will keep the ideas coming. And if I were you, I wouldn’t want to miss an idea… I mean, what if you missed THE idea?! Don’t take that chance – subscribe today!
Oh, and the usual disclaimer applies… as I am not a personal development, wealth, or health expert, I would advise speaking with a competent authority before making any decisions based upon the information presented in this post. Let me know your thoughts about today’s post in the comments!